Leap of Faith

Two days ago, I made my credit card do some heavy lifting. The purchase was for something I won’t be able to enjoy for several more weeks. Knowing its value, I felt the smallest rush of excitement when I hit “submit,” but it was more of a cerebral high than an emotional one. Mostly, I felt a rush of doubt, even worry, as I took the leap and committed hard-earned money for something personal. Why do leaps, even if we know we will land someplace wonderful, fill us with fear?

Barely recovered from the previous day’s thrill, yesterday I again walked up to the ledge and leapt. I littered my laptop screen with windows: Scrivener, iBooks, Kindle previewer, and multiple tabs in Safari (US copyright, Bowker, Kindle Direct Publishing, tutorials on uploading to KDP). At 11:54am, twelve hours and six minutes before the deadline to qualify for pre-order status, Ellen the Harpist was under review at Kindle. I was terrified.

Just to make it more fun, a former neighbor dropped in to say hi at 11:49. It was lovely to catch up with him, but my mind was elsewhere, wandering around the forest of fears. Why couldn’t I find my novel’s genre category in KDP’s category menu? Will readers be able to find my book? Did the file upload properly formatted?

Our friend left, I ate lunch, and then I walked back to the edge of the cliff and leapt again. iBooks. Nook. Now I had to wait for three different sites to approve my submission. I could think of nothing else – and nothing good – while I waited. And then it happened. At 6:13pm, KDP e-mailed me: “Your book is available for pre-order in Kindle Store!” I landed safely. Elation kicked in. I was a published author!

Goal setting is good. Planning how to attain the goal is important. But then it’s time to leap. The unknown often is exactly where we are meant to be.


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